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It must be five or six months since I have smoked. I had been meaning to stop for ages but never had and it was with the advent of fatherhood to my second child that I thought I really must knock this habit on the head... Before it knocked me on the head as it were.
So I stopped. Boom. Just like that.
I won't say it wasn't hard. It was difficult but I was determined and it paid off.
However... You would think that the longer you had stopped something the easier it would get? Oh no. More and more these days I have found myself harking back to the glory days.
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I find myself remembering all the good times in my life in which I just so happened to be smoking or had a cigarette in my hand. It is very bizarre because these things would all have happened anyway. But, in the wonderfully weird way the mind works, it has decided to throw these images at me as if it was smoking that caused all the great things to happen to me.
I suspect that the insidious nicotine still has a grip on me at some low level.
It has been building up. Slowly but surely, that little voice in my head has been telling me wouldn't it be great to be smoking right now?
It all came to a head today.
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I was coming back to work from my lunch break and had to pass the corner where all the smokers hung out. I felt a pang. I used to be one of them. I stopped for a moment.
Hey Richard, hows things?
I said to one of the guys I used to have many a conversation with.
Erm, alright mate.
He answered. He seemed a little awkward.
I turned to another one of my erstwhile bro's.
And you Bill, ya wild man, whatcha been up to!
I gave Bill a mock shoulder punch. Me and Bill went way back.
Not much mate. Not much.
He answered.
I stayed for a few minutes longer trying to coax some conversation out of them. It was like getting blood out of a stone.
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I knew what was happening. I was no longer in the gang. I had stopped smoking and as such was now ostracised from the "cool kids" who still did it. Maybe they were envious of my new found longevity now that I was off the tabs?
I sighed and went back into work. I would like to say that being ostracised by the gang had strengthened my resolve not to smoke but if anything it had made it worse. I sat at my desk and attempted to do some work. A thought kept popping into my head, however.
Surely it wouldn't be so bad to just have the one?
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Just one ickle-wickle cigarette. Just one. I mean I could buy some, then head down to the corner and chew the fat with the guys. I just knew that as soon as they saw me smoking again I would be back in the club. There would be back slaps and handshakes and manly shouts of celebration.
Yeah, damn it. I was going to do it. Why not? I mean. I had shown myself to be capable of stopping on a whim. I would just have one.
I reached behind me for my jacket and as I did so I noticed Bill from smokers corner coming over to my desk.
Hey dude, I meant to say, did you see my new phone? It's so cool!
He leaned in to show me his shiny new phone. I opened my mouth to ask if he was heading downstairs and if I could come with him.
Then I smelled it. The acrid smell of cigarettes. He stank of them. Absolutely reeked, like a corpse that had been dipped in glue and rolled in a giant ashtray.
Suddenly I didn't feel the urge to smoke anymore.
All pictures sourced from pixabay and in most cases subjected to various manipulations. Except the gif, it was made by my own fair hands :0)
Authored by: @meesterboom
Really great success ..congratulations..I worte also how i had been quitting the smoke..
Smoker of 16 long years. It's been a month and 25 days(4 months now) since my last puff. Here's my story;
My first day:Woke up late and got busy with some urgent official work. Unusually it was 4 PM without a smoke. I thought, this could be the day I quit smoking.
The day had to pass without smoking. I decided not refusing anything to myself, but smoking. Started with ordering some good food. Did some long pending online shopping. Bought a movie online. It was 6PM and I immersed myself into the movie. Had food, completed movie, spent time with family and it was 9 o' clock. Dinner and some socialization, touched 11PM. Buying a pack, is 15 KM drive now. Was about to have my first day of another attempt.
It's tough to sleep:Time to bed. Nicotine urge kept me awake so started browsing some literature about quitting and stumbled upon following http://whyquit.com/whyquit/A_Ben.... Felt motivated and slept. I can't say I slept well but I did sleep. Next day when I woke up, I did not want to loose on the struggle of my last day.
My first day at work: On the way to work, I had successfully crossed my cigarette shop. It felt good. The day began. Thoughts were foggy, was unable to focus, so decided to finish some pending back office work. Avoided co-smokers. Avoided situations that create the urge. Time was moving slow. It felt like I will never be normal again. I might loose my creativity. Which feels like a joke now. Lesson: coffee does not help, but increases the urge.
The day had to pass, and food came to rescue. I ordered food in good quantity and shared. Sharing always makes you feel good. Did not have mid day, after lunch - cigarette. Ordered some more food in the evening. Day passed.
First week: Evenings were tough but food, movies, family and hobbies helped. Was unable to get good night sleep but when I woke up, the mouth was not so bad, mood was better.
I do not smell so bad. There is no need to have mouth fresheners regularly. Regular taste in the mouth is better. Throat is not sour always. I attended a family function, felt free that I do not need to find excuses to go out.
I had reasons to continue this journey. I kept reading health journals. Light headedness felt bad first but then I started enjoying it.
I did not fall for "only smoke when you drink" formula, and realized alcohol works better without nicotine.
Face it: Week two, I went out with co-smokers when they smoke, but did not smoke. Had some disagreements, but did not smoke. Enjoyed alcohol without smoke. Visited all the places where I used to smoke but did not. In stress, the first thing that came to my mind was to smoke, but did not. I kept having winning encounters. I requested my close co-workers to co-operate regarding my attitude.
End of physical urge: Generally week three is, when the physical urge reduces drastically. It feels better, stronger. I realized that, when we smoke, the mood swings are frequent. Immediately after smoke, it feels good but the mood swings towards a decline and one has to smoke to get it back to high. Now I am free of nicotine related mood swings. When I wake up I am not so annoyed.
55 Days Passed: I am out of the physical urge. I can sleep peacefully. Health is better. Food tastes better. I wake up fresher. Stamina has increased. I feel good about myself.
(Edit)4 Months Passed: Felt like having a puff, during many booze sessions. It only occurs when someone lits and takes a first puff. Once you pass the first puff, it doesn't matter. It's like you are involved in a discussion. It rarely occurs that you are not smoking.
10 Months: Frequency of throat infection has reduced. Brushing teeth in the morning is a better experience. When asked, still count myself to be a smoker at first, then I proudly tell em that it's been … months that I did not smoke.
All the best.