I do not know what happened that day. I did not see those and close my eyes when I called. I walked into your room, answered the phone, and started crying, I couldn’t bear to see that at this time. I closed my eyes and fell asleep. I never dreamed I was in this day. I prayed for you that day, your death was not too hard because I knew I would be next, I kept you safe and you would be well remembered. It wasn’t easy. I prayed hard, I couldn’t find anything to say, so I just slept. Then I dreamt that I heard a loud thud and a scream. I got out of bed and looked out the window. Then I looked at the sky. The sun was at full moon. The light was faint and soon it will fade, but the terror of what was happening was still there. I ran to the phone and called you, I was sure it was you. I told you that I loved you, that I would be at your bedside. Then I told you that I was sorry, but you seemed just like any other sick child. I ran for my life, as fast as I could. a few minutes later you called, calling me. I ran too but I couldn’t. It was too late, I just died, nothing can wake me. I could not find anything to say and I kept talking to myself. It was a long time before I said anything else, I think that will always be the hardest time in my life. I have tried so hard to forget everything, to move on and get over this, even though I know that I will never really have you again. I tried everything but I could not change it, not one day. I kept trying to hide the horrible things that I saw. That day you died I just stayed in this place, knowing that I wouldn’t make it to the place I dreamed of. Finally, I went to my room and cried, calling my mother, pleading for her to come home. My mother would not answer. I waited and waited, hoping that she would answer, that she would understand. But no one did. I thought that it was all for nothing, that my soul would be free and that my name would change forever. But it was not. I will never get my name back. I would die on that day.