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 --- A GOPHER-LIKE INTERFACE FOR HIVE BLOCKCHAIN ---

Comedy Open Mic - Round 10

BY: @comedyopenmic | CREATED: April 20, 2018, 8:10 a.m. | VOTES: 114 | PAYOUT: $42.67 | [ VOTE ]

Welcome to the Tenth week of The Comedy Open Mic Contest.

Please read the contest rules here

[IMAGE: https://steemit-production-imageproxy-thumbnail.s3.amazonaws.com/DQmWHJgPDRVLxFz3cUxFCvWUdYPwJm1XhxTLGqLfYeg3wqg_1680x8400]
Credit to our Dandy (@dandesign86) for creating this logo for us

Rules for Judges

Judges:

@dj123 / @comedyopenmic
@take5
@dandesign86
@amirtheawesome1
@holybranches / @comedyopenmic
@diebitch

If you see any of these guys around please upvote and thank them. It is because of their support that this contest is able to keep functioning.

Do you want to be a judge?

Read all the entries, comment on contestant posts. Leave a positive trail of happiness and laughter behind you like you fart laughing gas and we will notice. Our most active curators and contestants will be asked to join us as guest judges on a week to week basis.

[IMAGE: https://smalbanynewyork.files.wordpress.com/2013/03/clown-judge.jpg]
Src

Prizes (Have again increased!!)

This week's prize pool 70SBD + 40 Steem

[IMAGE: https://cdn.xl.thumbs.canstockphoto.com/funny-clown-holding-money-funny-clown-showing-some-dollar-bills-isolated-on-whites-stock-photo_csp4674032.jpg]
Src

Curators

A number of people have put themselves forward as curators of content to encourage more entries.

@carlgnash (Also really funny, we want more entries from him)
@punchline (Still hoping George Carlin comes back to life)
@steemwizards (No idea who he is but he's good fun)
@nonameslefttouse (Make it a good story to get his attention)
@trafalgar (Include #punchline tag to grab his attention)
@bitfiend (We just like him, dunno why)
@diebitch (Don't be mean, or she'll roast you)
If you see any of these guys around please upvote and thank them. It is because of their support that this contest is able to keep functioning.

[IMAGE: https://steemit-production-imageproxy-thumbnail.s3.amazonaws.com/DQmbNxN1YJwH3jwMidupe8iEuQ1JAgcW1qUircEhkLRLj3S_1680x8400]
Src

Sponsors

Donations

A big thank you to @ilt-yodith, @idikuci, @steemmatt, @dandesign86, who were very generous in donating additional funds towards prizes.
@idikuci - 194SBD , @dj123 - 122SBD + 5 Steem, @punchline - 80 Steem + 10SBD, @take5 - 53 SBD, @dandesign86 and @redlipstick - 32SBD, @ilt-yodith - 14.891SBD + 10.899 Steem, @amirtheawesome1 / @yesaye - 20SBD, @nonameslefttouse - 10SBD, @thedailylaugh - 10SBD, @meesterboom - 10SBD, @dreemit - 5SBD, @thevillan - 5SBD, @sisygoboom - @5SBD, @belemo - 3SBD, @steemmatt - 3SBD, @jedi-won - 2SBD, @bitfiend - 2SBD, @diebitch - 2SBD, @lunasilver 0.007 Steem

Delegations

Due to New Delegations from @ngc, @groovatti, @cemke, @amirtheawesome1 and @yesaye we now have over 40,000 SP delegated to @comedyopenmic

@ngc - 20,000SP, @roelandp - 15,556SP, @idikuci - 2,000SP, @dandesign86 / @bluetower - 500SP, @dj123 - 500SP, @take5 - 500SP, @flipstar - 300SP, @mightpossibly - 250SP, @yesaye - 162SP, @jasonschick - 125SP, @diebitch - 100SP, @amirtheawesome1 - 100SP, @ubongj - 50SP, @abh12345 - 50SP, @cemke - 40SP, @bitfiend - 35SP, @holybranches - 10SP, @groovatti - 10SP

Please send any donations and SP delegations directly to @comedyopenmic. The more funding we get, the longer it will be possible to run the contest and upvote all you hilarious people.

Important Information

If you see our judges, curators or sponsors comments or posts, please upvote and encourage them. They are giving up their time to help this contest, so if you see these guys around, say hello and give them an upvote:

@roelandp, @ngc, @comedyopenmic, @dj123, @nonameslefttouse, @dandesign86 / @bluetower, @carlgnash, @take5, @ilt-yodith, @punchline, @steemwizards, @trafalgar, @meesterboom, @dreemit, @redlipstick, @thedailylaugh, @flipstar, @steemmatt, @bitfiend, @thevillan, @jedi-won, @belemo, @jasonshick, @diebitch, @ubongj, @bitfiend, @holybranches, @lunasilver, @cemke, @amirtheawesome1.

We are all trying to make this a successful contest to raise participation in #funny and attract more comedians and aspiring comedians to Steem.

This post marks the end of Round 9 and the start of Round 10 of Comedy Open Mic.

Within 24hrs of this post, another post will go out marking the prize recipients. Sorry about the double post, but we need to make sure we have time to enjoy all the entries.

Come join our discord channel and just say hi.

Are you Artistically inclined? Join in the Logo and Banner design contest and win some cash.

Plagiarism

If you believe someone has submitted a plagiarised entry, please let the judges know. You can let us know on the discord channel or as a reply to one of our comments. As long as contestants make an effort to produce original content and provide sources for other material we will be happy to accept the entry.

Good Luck and Happy Steeming!!

[IMAGE: https://cdn.discordapp.com/attachments/437800498708348929/437850278004523018/COM_Witness_Supporter.png]
Thank you to @matytan for the great banner

TAGS: [ #comedyopenmic ] [ #funny ] [ #contest ] [ #promo-steem ] [ #steemit ]

Replies

@jayed007 | April 20, 2018, 8:11 a.m. | Votes: 3 | [ VOTE ]

Best of luck everyone go go go go...... And make us luck 😀

@armiaaceh | April 20, 2018, 8:27 a.m. | Votes: 3 | [ VOTE ]

Wow,
Not feel more than two months contest #comedyopenmic.
Hopefully more success and this contest will continue.
Thank you very much for this happiness

@che-nie | April 20, 2018, 8:30 a.m. | Votes: 3 | [ VOTE ]

here we come again round 10 comedy open mic i m excited to share another funny stories to make us laugh..thank you curators for your undying support to this contest.

@greene101 | April 20, 2018, 8:31 a.m. | Votes: 4 | [ VOTE ]

[IMAGE: https://steemitimages.com/DQmRWDRa4jw5dhChzeQnWqPMAz7EP5yxPW2Y7q56Wj1DqJ6/U5dqyTbiM9LYS3hLKZu7fLecmbDVSzT.gif]

@yesaye | April 20, 2018, 12:09 p.m. | Votes: 3 | [ VOTE ]

When your natural sex instinct suddenly kicks in

@holybranches | April 20, 2018, 12:36 p.m. | Votes: 1 | [ VOTE ]

dolls, powering boys up from cradle

@yesaye | April 21, 2018, 4:26 a.m. | Votes: 2 | [ VOTE ]

*Empowering

@yesaye | April 21, 2018, 4:27 a.m. | Votes: 10 | [ VOTE ]

yeah idk either.

@mineopoly | April 21, 2018, 2:56 a.m. | Votes: 1 | [ VOTE ]

That is outrageous testosterone.

@yesaye | April 21, 2018, 4:28 a.m. | Votes: 2 | [ VOTE ]

I used to rape my dolls.

@profanereviews | April 21, 2018, 7:47 p.m. | Votes: 0 | [ VOTE ]

That's funny. My dolls used to rape me. I'm tougher now because of it.

@masterlegend | April 20, 2018, 8:38 a.m. | Votes: 3 | [ VOTE ]

no dout great comedy

@mdriadrahman26 | April 20, 2018, 8:40 a.m. | Votes: 4 | [ VOTE ]

its so amazing platform of comedy..really great
thanks for great work

@samueldouglas | April 20, 2018, 8:41 a.m. | Votes: 6 | [ VOTE ]

Cry 'Havoc', and let slip the dogs of war.

Woof, woof bitches!

On a less apocalyptic note, has anyone tried to do some comedy-themed outreach via twitter etc.? The Melbourne Comedy festival is on at the moment (saw Marcel Blanch-de Wilt last night - still recovering), so it just occured to me that a lot of Aussie standup comedians might be a bit more active on social media than usual.

Seems like a no-brainer, because most of these people - the ones performing in the small clubs, not the big venues, could use a bit of extra cash...

@holybranches | April 20, 2018, 8:48 a.m. | Votes: 2 | [ VOTE ]

you could come over to the discord dungeon and have everyone wank over this golden idea. cheers Dougy

@idikuci | April 20, 2018, 9:04 a.m. | Votes: 3 | [ VOTE ]

We are always looking at ways of reaching people outside steem to bring them in. We are in the process of developing a reddit and twitter presence to try to bring more people in. If you have a idea on how to reach more people we'd love to hear it.

@samueldouglas | April 20, 2018, 9:15 a.m. | Votes: 2 | [ VOTE ]

I'm too sleep deprived for any more bright ideas today - not that contacting comedians on twitter is rocket surgery or anything.

@dj123 | April 20, 2018, 9:59 a.m. | Votes: 0 | [ VOTE ]

>rocket surgery

daem that's some advance wank concept you got there, come meet us in the #marketing channel in discord to hand job....ahem mean hash out the brain farts....i mean precision darts

@gnarlyanimations | April 22, 2018, 4:32 a.m. | Votes: 1 | [ VOTE ]

I do 3d animation of the comedy variety, video edit all that jazz, i could do up a couple videos for you or something let me know , cheers

@idikuci | April 22, 2018, 5:18 a.m. | Votes: 0 | [ VOTE ]

Absolutely that would be really cool and greatly appreciated. Hit us up on discord and we can talk if you have time.

Discord

@rahmanmdriad | April 20, 2018, 8:41 a.m. | Votes: 3 | [ VOTE ]

another great Comedy Open Mic round ,no dout its so enjoyable .
really great pleasant .i love

@holybranches | April 20, 2018, 8:44 a.m. | Votes: 2 | [ VOTE ]

Fcuk! More prizes! Massive improvement! Go team!

@roselover | April 20, 2018, 8:50 a.m. | Votes: 2 | [ VOTE ]

The competition is very big and really very impressive
I hope to be of participation and to be from the judiciary
Special military manufacture

@profanereviews | April 21, 2018, 3:48 p.m. | Votes: 1 | [ VOTE ]

What? Are the judges here manufacturing special military? Fuck, I knew this was too good to be true.

How are they doing it, brainwashing us with promises of riches if we get the world preoccupied with laughing? Come on, you have to tell us.

@retiredinsamar | April 20, 2018, 8:55 a.m. | Votes: 2 | [ VOTE ]

Here is my entry for Comedy Open Mic Round 10: "I'm Too Busy!".

@profanereviews | April 21, 2018, 3:22 p.m. | Votes: 1 | [ VOTE ]

Shit, you are really into college boys, huh? Whatever keeps you young, brother.

@retiredinsamar | May 2, 2018, 2:57 a.m. | Votes: 1 | [ VOTE ]

Whooosh! That was the sound of that joke going over your head!

@profanereviews | May 2, 2018, 3:30 a.m. | Votes: 0 | [ VOTE ]

Oh, there was a joke?

@raftaar | April 20, 2018, 9:27 a.m. | Votes: 1 | [ VOTE ]

This is a good comedy place.massive improvement go them. best of luck..

@comedyopenmic | April 20, 2018, 10:12 a.m. | Votes: 3 | [ VOTE ]

Why not join us? Put in an entry and get upvotes and maybe some prizes.

@belemo | April 20, 2018, 10:24 a.m. | Votes: 2 | [ VOTE ]

Who let the crazies out? @comedyopenmic did

@rastaufik10 | April 20, 2018, 10:39 a.m. | Votes: 3 | [ VOTE ]

Come all Indonesian steemian join in Comedy Open Mic, do not feel comedian if not participate in this contest. Ha ha.

@yesaye | April 20, 2018, 12:09 p.m. | Votes: 2 | [ VOTE ]

Listen to this Indonesian man @ all

@profanereviews | April 21, 2018, 3:31 p.m. | Votes: 0 | [ VOTE ]

I can't. I'm not Indonesian. I wish he had addressed Canadians as well. Sad Face.

@yesaye | April 20, 2018, 12:24 p.m. | Votes: 3 | [ VOTE ]

guys, this is going great.
this is amazing.

@giselacan | April 20, 2018, 1:47 p.m. | Votes: 2 | [ VOTE ]

Wonderful, let's start moving those neurons to do something funny for this round, good luck to all ...., the prizes are great!

@jasonshick | April 20, 2018, 3:20 p.m. | Votes: 2 | [ VOTE ]

This is really picking up Steem (pun intended) will get an entry in this week and also try and grab that Chuck Norris award. is it possible to win two prizes?

@idikuci | April 20, 2018, 8:35 p.m. | Votes: 0 | [ VOTE ]

We try keep it it one prize per person but it is possible to win chuck norris and win a prize for competing.

@guitarkev | April 20, 2018, 4:18 p.m. | Votes: 2 | [ VOTE ]

A big hello to everyone, this is my entry #1 for round 10 :)
https://steemit.com/comedyopenmic/@guitarkev/comedy-open-mic-round-10-the-best-son-entry-1

@bifilarcoil | April 20, 2018, 9:19 p.m. | Votes: 1 | [ VOTE ]

My entry this week: https://steemit.com/comedyopenmic/@bifilarcoil/vote-hair-a-pre-view-on-the-2020-elections-comedy-open-mic-round-10

[IMAGE: https://steemitimages.com/DQmSHJ8w8Jdoi4KD3rnmrGyqqsqUUMrpK82XgZSxYikG9oC/votehair.png]

Keep drinking FRAC!RAW. :-)

@palikari123 | April 21, 2018, 1:53 a.m. | Votes: 2 | [ VOTE ]

Here is my entry for round 10....Ty Ty Ty

https://steemit.com/tinfoilraps/@palikari123/tin-foil-raps-2-a-paranoid-rhymes-contest-syrian-edition-comedy-open-mic-round-10

@mineopoly | April 21, 2018, 2:59 a.m. | Votes: 2 | [ VOTE ]

Help me!! Open mic has turned my peaceful blog into a riot. LOL

This contest is great. I have been looking for a place to get some laughs here and this is the place to be. Best of laughs.

@profanereviews | April 21, 2018, 3:19 p.m. | Votes: 2 | [ VOTE ]

Thanks for putting this on.

Here I go again. Let's see if this fucker can gain traction.

https://steemit.com/funny/@profanereviews/sheep-shagging-a-tutorial

I'd like to thank the Academy for their consideration.

@nickyhavey | April 21, 2018, 3:51 p.m. | Votes: 3 | [ VOTE ]

Here's my entry, I've called it Moon Noobs

Thanks for the nomination @lucygarrod

@profanereviews | April 21, 2018, 5:05 p.m. | Votes: 1 | [ VOTE ]

Smart post.

I'm still too afraid to buy cryptocurrency. I was going to buy Steem when I first got on here, but don't trust all of the whales to do the right thing. I see way too much abuse of the system and until that cools down, I can't justify investing what little spare cash I have in it.

@nickyhavey | April 21, 2018, 9:55 p.m. | Votes: 0 | [ VOTE ]

Hehe, I was for years man - then I just watched video after video, read more and more to understand it then I just thought, screw it, I'll take the plunge and went for it.

I wouldn't buy anything that you can get for free like steem, musicoin or others by earning through content creation. Otherwise yea, you do get abuse of the system.

@cryptkeeper17 | April 21, 2018, 5:51 p.m. | Votes: 2 | [ VOTE ]

Here is my submission, hope it makes you laugh, thanks for putting on the contest and @profanereviews for sending me this way with his nomination... how-3-people-from-my-family-peed-on-a-friend-of-mine-in-a-week

@profanereviews | April 21, 2018, 11:41 p.m. | Votes: 1 | [ VOTE ]

Well, for fuck sake. I didn't know that you had to leave this page. I've just been checking out these posts on here and then noticed other posts that are carrying the round ten title that aren't on here.

Don't I feel like a dolt. That explains so much about the last times I entered.

@gnarlyanimations | April 22, 2018, 8:59 p.m. | Votes: 0 | [ VOTE ]

Do we have to make a seperate post for entries? All the memes posted has confused me

@profanereviews | April 23, 2018, 12:17 a.m. | Votes: 0 | [ VOTE ]

I don't know what you mean. I thought that the entry link had to be posted here, so I thought that these were all the entries. They aren't. The comedyopenmic tag and then click "new" will take you to the entries.

@gnarlyanimations | April 22, 2018, 4:34 a.m. | Votes: 0 | [ VOTE ]

[IMAGE: https://steemitimages.com/DQmSpZQjMQ5QSSE4zk5ZNsuPryR9nws6UiUMNxkfKZPx8qk/Turner%20Hoochfinal.jpg]

@gmuxx | April 22, 2018, 12:43 p.m. | Votes: 2 | [ VOTE ]

[IMAGE: https://steemitimages.com/DQmPrMUajMbCns8zGWVCiZ9eZa6JnRbYUYsFKq78u1uM1uE/Sir%20Muxxy%20Rides%20Again.png]

HERE is my submission. I hope it tickles some funnybones. Good luck everyone.

@beturrio | April 22, 2018, 11:35 p.m. | Votes: 2 | [ VOTE ]

Excellent, I'm going to prepare my entry!!!

@disguarpe | April 22, 2018, 11:46 p.m. | Votes: 1 | [ VOTE ]

I am already competing in the Round 10, luck to all the clowns!

@steembottrackerr | April 22, 2018, 11:58 p.m. | Votes: 0 | [ VOTE ]

https://steemitimages.com/200x200/https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/originals/81/28/3c/81283c6aed7bdb5b9f8ad73b8ce62c2f.jpg

Hello @comedyopenmic , Congratulations ✅ . Your content began to appear in the hot section.
I am the information account of "SteemBotTracker" site.

Your Informations
Total SBD: 283.639
Total STEEM: 1.753

I recommend to increase this;
You can make "Resteem" and advertise to the followers of the whale accounts.
"Resteem Bot" for you;
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You can purchase "upvote" by bid bots.
"Upvote Bot"
✅ The most profitable whale in the last round. @buildawhale

I'm taking this message once. You need to use the #steembottrackerr tag for more information.
Those who "upvote" this interpretation will be awarded a "UpVote" prize of 100 Sbd per week per person.
I am a bot, I can not answer the comment. I hope I could help. Good luck. Sorry if I disturbed you.

@yonilkar | April 23, 2018, 2:49 a.m. | Votes: 0 | [ VOTE ]

https://steemit.com/comedyopenmicespanol/@yonilkar/comedy-open-mic-espanol-ronda-2 mi entrada

@rikanurrizki | April 23, 2018, 2:58 a.m. | Votes: 0 | [ VOTE ]

Thank you for the opportunity

@jephtha | April 23, 2018, 8:49 a.m. | Votes: 0 | [ VOTE ]

I really commend the effort of @comedyopenmic and the #team for making steemit fun filled while rewarding people in the process

@yanosh01 | April 23, 2018, 9:19 a.m. | Votes: 0 | [ VOTE ]

I'll make my Comedy Open Mic entry ASAP. But at the moment...... Good Morning:
[IMAGE: https://steemitimages.com/DQmToqFpnwaEtmka5f2sy6h5MQYxkdEka8kw2KB6agmQF8g/funny-memes25-1.jpg]

@retiredinsamar | May 2, 2018, 3:11 a.m. | Votes: 1 | [ VOTE ]

Ha, someone ought to slap a bumper stinker on it that warns about "Following Too Closely!"

@japhofin8or | April 23, 2018, 10:08 a.m. | Votes: 0 | [ VOTE ]

This is such a great initiative! There is far too little comedy in the Steemit community. I know that this competition will find a comfortable home here. Fantastic idea! Thanks to you and all of the generous supporters for getting this going!

@sittishabir | April 23, 2018, 1:58 p.m. | Votes: 0 | [ VOTE ]

I want to participate again this time

@negativer | April 23, 2018, 6:07 p.m. | Votes: 1 | [ VOTE ]

Dropping mine here. I couldn't find anything to write about.

How to Win at Anything!

@guitarkev | April 23, 2018, 6:33 p.m. | Votes: 0 | [ VOTE ]

This is my second entry, I hope you have fun and still enjoy all the contents

https://steemit.com/comedyopenmic/@guitarkev/comedy-open-mic-round-10-my-fears-entry-2

@tinypaleokitchen | April 23, 2018, 7:06 p.m. | Votes: 1 | [ VOTE ]

Lots of laughs to be had in here, as always. Here is my entry for this week.

@gmuxx | April 23, 2018, 7:10 p.m. | Votes: 0 | [ VOTE ]

Insightful limerick :D

@tinypaleokitchen | April 23, 2018, 7:11 p.m. | Votes: 0 | [ VOTE ]

Thank you. Funny thing is, it's sort of autobiographical. I remember laughing very very hard at a mate of mine who actually had this happen to him. :-D He was naive enough to tell me about it, too. LOL

@gmuxx | April 23, 2018, 7:12 p.m. | Votes: 0 | [ VOTE ]

Haha, silly man

@alexnpianomusic | April 25, 2018, 3:16 a.m. | Votes: 0 | [ VOTE ]

Hi, guys from the comedy open mic, here's my joke, I hope you like it and let me have your vote! = D

"Pirates!"

https://st-listas.20minutos.es/images/2010-03/199400/2175329_640px.jpg?1268041919
https://steemit.com/comedyopenmic/@alexnpianomusic/comedy-openmic-round-10-pirates-by-alexnpianomusic

thanks @comedyopenmic @dj123 and everyone who makes this contest every week!

@adamkun | April 25, 2018, 9:18 a.m. | Votes: 1 | [ VOTE ]

https://steemit.com/comedyopnmic/@adamkun/comedy-ope-mic-round-10-1st-entry-the-hilarious-conversation-between-teacher-and-student

@adamkun | April 25, 2018, 10:56 a.m. | Votes: 1 | [ VOTE ]

https://steemit.com/comedyopnmic/@adamkun/comedy-ope-mic-round-10-1st-entry-the-hilarious-conversation-between-teacher-and-student

@bex-dk | April 25, 2018, 2:29 p.m. | Votes: 0 | [ VOTE ]

I keep saying I'm not good at humor, but I got persuaded to enter again anyway. https://steemit.com/poetry/@bex-dk/speedy-the-pony-comedy-open-mic-10

@popsoz | April 25, 2018, 4:24 p.m. | Votes: 0 | [ VOTE ]

Here's my entry #1 for week #10: "Scientists say Uranus smells bad"
https://steemit.com/comedyopenmic/@popsoz/comedy-open-mic-round-10-entry-1

@betavirosis | April 25, 2018, 8:40 p.m. | Votes: 1 | [ VOTE ]

Me, as always ... Late but sure!

https://steemit.com/comedyopencmic/@betavirosis/comedyopenmic-round-10-the-intention-is-what-counts

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=m_oJC36PMMs&t=6s

@jonsnoww | April 26, 2018, 2:36 p.m. | Votes: 0 | [ VOTE ]

Late, But sure!!!:.. i want present the new super Heroe!!!!

https://steemit.com/comedyopenmic/@jonsnoww/comedy-openmic-round-10-bagman-by-jonsnoww

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fwN-ynTutvk

@popsoz | April 26, 2018, 3:50 p.m. | Votes: 0 | [ VOTE ]

Here's my entry #2:
https://steemit.com/comedyopenmic/@popsoz/comedy-open-mic-round-10-entry-2
[IMAGE: https://steemitimages.com/DQmWyJcQnZvf9NtvCZmrKn7iiQ9V7nhsV9PiKdY7mhzW9ZR/Crooked-Financial-Advisor.png]

@alheath | April 26, 2018, 7:24 p.m. | Votes: 0 | [ VOTE ]

My submission for Round 10. Good luck to everyone else taking part!

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